EAVESDROPPING ON THE LEAGUE

My buddy (and hockey fan) down at the local FBI office decided recently to put his access to wiretapping technology to good use. Here’s a sample of what he picked up…..


(*ring* -*ring*) …. Hello- Mr. Bowman? …. Yes….Please, please, please come save our team!! We’ll give you anything you…..How many times do I have to tell you? I’m not interested!….but, but ….(*click*)


(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hello….hi Brian its Kevin, how’s it going pal?…..(*click*)
(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hello….come on man, you’re not still pissed are you?….(*click*)
(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hello….I didn’t do it to you to make you mad, I….(*click*)
(*ring* -*ring*) ….Look here you weasel, you better quit calling me before I come up there and kick your punk ass all over Alberta!! Do you hear me??? I’ve had it up to here with you, you low down double-crossing S.O.B! ….umm…Mr. Burke, this is your paperboy Timmy, I was just calling to remind you that your payment is due Friday….(*click*)


(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hi, you’ve reached Sidney Crosby, I can’t come to the phone right now I’m busy building a trophy room to house all of the hardware I will be getting each year as I dominate this league and pick apart each teams weak attempt to stop me. If you’re calling to congratulate me on all of my success or to tell me how great you think I am, please leave a brief message after the beep and I’ll get back to you…well…I won’t get back to you but thanks for the kind words. If this is an official calling, you better recognize that I’ll be wearing the “C” next year and that means you’ll have to listen to me!!! Thank you and have a nice day….(*Beep*)….ummm….Happy Birthday? ….(*click*)


(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hello…. Mr. Messier? ….Yes….how are you today sir? ….fine….my name is Paul and I represent Kleenex brand tissue, we here at Kleenex would love to sponsor you at the HHOF ceremony this fall. Would you be interested? ….(*click*)


(*ring* -*ring*) ….Hello….Hi, Dean? Chris Pronger here. I was wondering how you were feeling….Hello? ….Dean it’s Prongs, are you feeling better? I really didn’t mean to lay you out like that….Hello?? ….I was just calling because I felt bad about how things went down and I….Hello??….Hello??….something’s wrong with the phone, it just keeps ringing and ringing no matter how many times I answer it….wait, maybe it’s the Bat-phone, the city may be in trouble! To the Bat-cave!!….(*click*)